Did I just say that? Yes, I guess I did. It does not exist. Most of what is called NLP is the product of the researches and hardcore philosophy debates of Richard Bandler, John Grinder, Robert Dilts and their colleagues.

Still, NLP does not really exist. Point to it, can you? No. Can you put it in a barrell, as they say in one of the meta model patterns? No, you cannot. Can you prove it works, right now, right here? Not necessarily.

NLP does not exist, but it does create an effect. It is not a cause, but it shows results. NLP creates more questions than answers, mainly because practitioners miss the most important element of any philosophy, model and technique that is taught under the “NLP” tag.

What is it? Can’t you tell?

To remember that NLP does not exist! To remember that everything taught within the trainings, forums, books, audio programs, TV shows, etc. – everything that is learned under the title “NLP” ought to be treated with suspicion, with flexibility, with a determination to find something better, to contradict, to eliminate the core beliefs (the holy cows) of NLP and create new ones.

I don’t know Richard Bandler personally, but I’m pretty sure it was his intention when he said, that NLP is a creation of his imagination, something he authored, constructed.

Go and demolish his theories and build new ones, better ones. This way you will show more respect to Richard Bandler than memorizing the phobia cure script by heart or translating the bible upon the meta-model…

How to do the “right” NLP? I read this question very often online, even from Master practitioners, people who SHOULD know already that “right” NLP cannot be.

Flexibility in NLP is about experimentation, trying out new things, going like spaceship Entreprise to new worlds, new frontiers.

I’m not going to drag this post too long. It’s understood, I hope. Do not accept anything you learn from NLP trainers as if it was the constitution. It is not. Question everything, anything and by anyone. Do that, and you’ll get your own road of NLP.

A good advice that a colleague of mine gave our group is, to name NLP with something else. Give it a different name. You don’t have to invent the wheel or create a new phobia cure pattern. Just name it with a name of your own. Call it “The Michael Jackson Decision Destroyer Pattern”… It will get you out of the frame of “I am doing NLP”. It’s a good advice, I believe.

Whatever you do, may you only succeed, because just like Frank Sinatra you should say “I did it my way”…

Here’s a discussion on this topic in our forums