By: Shlomo Vaknin, C.Ht

Our body is important, that should be obvious to you too. However, in some way, we’re getting used to the most devastating and wrong concepts of all when it comes to our body: the concept of eternity.

People who should not be fat are still fat because of their disrespectful belief system regarding their body. These people, who should not be fat, but are fat, have no reasonable physical condition to gain weight and keep it on. They have a mental condition which prevents them from respecting their body.

There is no other explanation. You can blame habits, traditions, genetics, your parents or neighbors, the market which sell cheap fast food but expensive healthy food, and so on. If your doctor tells you that there is no physical source for your overweight situation – you are fat because you’re fat, period.

When you’re fat because you’re fat, you take the world in a different way inside. You are not just obese, you’re sucking whatever energy you can from the world. Instead of taking it easy out there, learning to give a lot and get a lot without calculations, you are out there to gain whatever you can reach for, no matter if you need it or not.

This could be partially blamed on your habits. True, I agree, your habits can sabotage your weight loss efforts. You want to lose weight, you have good reasons – perhaps it’s spring and you want to look good in your swimming suit in the summer, perhaps you’re getting married or have a date soon, perhaps you’re feeling a dreadful feeling of tiredness and fatigue, perhaps the only clothes that seem to fit on you are those black ones which create the delusion that you’re thinner than fatter… whatever it is, if you have good reasons to lose weight, and if you have good intentions to lose weight and keep it off you body – it does not matter a bit to your internal weight management officer.

I call it a weight management officer because that process is a part of a larger set of processes, which are running subconsciously and beyond your conscious capability to comprehend or control. Something in you is controlling you. Starts to sound like a horror movie, isn’t it… “I seeeee youuuu….”. Well, to tell you the truth – I see you too.

When you step out to the world, people see you. Whether you like it or not, you’re going to have to face society in one way or another, more than just several minutes a week. Unless you’re a complete loner who lives up on the mountains, feeding on mushrooms he grows behind his tiny cabin – you are being seen all the time.

And let’s face the truth – maybe that’s a part of your fake desire to lose weight? Maybe you’re not wanting the thinner sexier healthier more attractive body you could have for the sake of your ultimate potential of health. Maybe you’re just a shallow thinker, who sees beautiful thinner people out there getting attention, and you’re getting not only less, but maybe none?

If you’re getting insulted – good! Any strong emotion is better than comfort when it comes to self change.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong in wanting to lose weight so you’d become more attractive to others and so you could be noticed more often, admired and desired. Really, there is nothing wrong with this fantasy. It could be a nice source of motivation. The question is, once you do lose the weight and discover that the people out there do not open their mouth in amazement to your new physical attractiveness… how fast would it take you to gain back all the weight you’ve lost?

We’re taking another step forward now. Keep yourself attuned.

Losing weight is a mistake. Even if you’re very fat, very obese and very unattractively large – losing weight is the wrong strategy.

When you’re fat because you’re fat, and not because of an unfortunate physical disability related directly to weight, you live in a completely different set of internal belief systems.

The most important process of these subconscious processes is the one that leads you impulsively to grab whatever your eyes fall on in the world our there.

Some therapists call it “the fear of loss”, when you eagerly grab all you can get right now, thinking that in the future it won’t be available for you anymore… Carpe Diem – in a horrifically distorted way.

I came to these conclusions after pondering quite a lot on Jim Rohn’s words: “don’t wish it would be easier – wish you were better; don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skills”.

Subconsciously, people who are fat because their fat, wish it would be easier. They wish for the easy way, with less problems, so they can enjoy the wealth that came upon them.

You may disagree. You may tell me, that in your case you’ve taken the hard way. You’ve stopped eating candies and overcame your Hershey addiction. You’ve gone jogging every day for 2 hours. You’ve joined the gym. Hey, you even lost weight! But it didn’t stay there, lost… it came back.

It’s not about the amount of effort you’re investing. It’s not about the amount of desire you have for a healthier thinner body. It’s not the amount of dedication you own for losing weight and keeping it lost.

I’m not a self help guru. I don’t care one bit about your motivation or desire or dedication towards you goals. I don’t believe that by affirmations or constant control you would achieve great things or reach a level of peak performance.

I am saying that you’re getting it all wrong if you keep your thoughts this way: all you need is some motivation, some product, some new diet, some exercise, some new habits… and you’re off on your way to reach your goals and keep them for life. Hey, you’ve seen proofs already – people who lost weight and kept it lost spoke about their amazement from that or this product on late night TV… or your neighbor, who became such a sexy being because she ate cucumbers 12 times a day for 3 months…

Whatever that is, if you feel I am wrong – by all means, go about it. Go prove me wrong. Go lose weight in your way and we’d see what happens next.

In my own internal world of belief systems, disrespect to your body does not necessarily mean that you eat a Pizza instead of a tomato. It does not mean that you eat 300 Hershey bars every week, or that the only physical exercise you allow yourself to participate in is the Thumbxercise which is known as the “zapping through 52 channels on TV”…

Disrespectful approach to your body, as far as I’m concerned, is when you prohibit yourself from eating a Pizza because you’re on diet. It’s when you burn all the Hershey bars in your house in an attempt to overcome your sweets addiction. It’s when your every movement is painful after 6.5 hours of working out in the gym. It’s when you don’t enjoy your body but work it out to fit your distorted desires.

If you want a better body, you must respect your body and come finally to the ultimate conclusion – this is the only body you would ever have.

You can exchange your habits. You can exchange your blood or liver. You can exchange your beliefs about god. You can exchange your entire identity.

But you cannot replace your body with another. Or, at least, it will cost you a bit more than the yearly budget of NASA.

It is painful to accept this. I know, it took me awhile myself. However, you’re lucky – because some people accept it only when they are about to die. Some don’t get even that chance.

Once you accept your body as the only one you’d ever have, you’re in an advantage – you don’t need to get out there to grab all you can grab. Nothing you grab can change the physical reality you live in.

The only improvement you can truly make in regards to your body, and that will influence all the rest of your physical desires – is the respect you project towards your body. The size of your body is not meaningful compared to the size of respect you ought to give it.

When you respect your body, you’d eat a Hershey Kiss with no remorse. You’d go out for jogging without a need for motivation. You’d buy the clothes you really like, knowing that whatever someone else thinks of you – has no meaning, because your respect to your body is higher than your self ego.

And surprisingly enough, when you respect your body – your body reciprocate. You will lose weight, because the new belief systems make it very clear that being obese is not aligned with keeping your body healthy. Being fat becomes an incongruence that must be resolved. It can only be resolved one way – losing that excess weight and keeping it lost.

It happens NATURALLY. You don’t need a special diet or an obsessive controlling attitude towards every bite you chew.

And here’s the last secret you ignored through this whole article: you can gain these new better beliefs if you’d read this article again. You missed it on the way, for sure…